Damn You, MTV

Dear MTV,

I have a grievance that I would like to discuss with you. No wonder my generation is so disappointed in their jobs and are feeling so entitled, it is all your fault (we also don't take responsibility well - but that is another topic). I spent my entire teen years intoxicated by the imagery that you portrayed as "The Real World".

Flash forward several years and I finally realize that you LIED to us! I graduated college to enter the real world and contrary to "The Real World", I do not live with 6 other people in a fabulously awesome house. I don't have an easy-breezy job where they don't really get upset if I show up late/hungover/or hardly work. I don't make out with my roommates or have a hottub fit for 7. I don't have free alcohol and free food. My entire apartment is approximately the size of one of the Real World kitchens. I have YET to get a letter in the mail telling me that I have an all-expense-paid trip to some exotic country (or Europe). I don't get to nap midday - and I actually have to go to the office every day of the week. While they go to fashionable nightclubs, I go to sleep.

You completely forgot to mention things like pantie-hose and auto insurance. Those people never have to get their oil changed or run to the post office - where is THAT episode?


There was absolutely no disclaimer on the television show. "Things start getting real?" There is very little ON that show that is real. Sigh. Maybe you should rethink the name to something less misleading like "The Non-Real World: Only the fantasy life for many teens". 


Next thing you know, they are going to tell us that getting married and having kids isn't like the Real Housewives of Orange Country. Sigh.


Peace, Love, and Lies,
Mallory

Stop looking at the neighbor's yard and water your own damn grass

I know, not a typical title for me. Not girly (but still sassy), here is the point: Sure, the grass might be greener on the otherside... but wouldn't we be happy with our own yard if we stopped comparing? Maybe if we spent more time watering our yard and less time peering over the fence (I picture Wilson from Home Improvement), then the grass would be greener on our side. And if we stopped comparing, we might be happy with our green just the way it is.

I wonder if any of you follow.

A study at Warton Business school stated that people would rather make $50,000 when their friends are making $25,000 than make $100,000 when their friends are making $250,000. Are we really that concerned about comparing ourselves to others? (Yes) And is it really necessary to wish for success compared to the people (our friends) who are supposed to accept us for who we are? Perhaps, if we changed our mindset we would be happier by comparing less. I'm not saying this is easy, but shouldn't we at least try? I think being aware of it is the first step.

My friend Ashlyn has the cutest wardrobe. I am talking designer, matching, put together, fashionable items. There are days that her hair is perfectly curled while mine is airdrying with the windows down on the way to work (don't pretend you haven't tried that move - and if you haven't? You so should!). Her shoes match her her clothes perfectly, while I am sometimes hoping that I am not wearing one black and one navy. (Okay, I'm not that bad, but just go with me). I will never be completely satisfied with my wardrobe if I compare myself to Ashlyn. Yes, I could try waking up 15 minutes earlier.. but lets be honest. But really, she doesn't care what I am wearing, and neither does my predominately male team. If I don't compare, my happiness goes up. (Or better yet, take myself on a shopping spree!)

Same thing goes for non-material situations. There was a day in HighSchool that I told my mom I was worried I wouldn't get into college. This wasn't because I was "dumb". I was in all honors classes. My problem was that I was comparing myself to students who were also overachievers and found myself mediocre in comparison. Compare less, study harder, and I would be just fine.

How many other times do I compare my work to the work of coworkers? Or compare my apartment to the apartment of my friend's? How can I turn all of this external focus inward and actually improve the one that matters?
1. Awareness. Okay, I am done taking notes from Wilson. Do we even know what that guy looks like anyways?
2. Water your own grass. Focus on my "yard" or wardrobe or work and stop caring about others. When noticing that focus changes, change it back
3. Focus on your strengths. My body type couldn't pull off half the stuff Ashlyn wears anyways!
4. Don't knock other's down. Why wish your friends made less than you? Shouldn't you be secure enough to want others to succeed as well?
5. I really want a 5th - any suggestions?