Tax Tuesday: Show me the money!

Note: If you owe money to the IRS, you can stop reading now. This post will only make you sad. (and no one wants to be sad)

So you have gathered the paperwork, picked a method to file, filed... and now you are checking your bank account and mail everyday for the increase in your financial status.

If you efiled (as I encouraged you to do!), you should get your refund in 75 hours. Don't wait on your computer clicking refresh every 10 seconds.. it is the IRS afterall, and they this rough estimate can vary based on how many returns came in at once.

If you filed a paper return? It should take 3-4 weeks. (what!? but im used to getting paid every 2 weeks.... welp, should have efiled)

Curious just where you stand? (of course you are! who DOESN'T want their money?) Well, the IRS was sick of phone calls from impatient taxpayers (or should I say, taxreceivers?) so they created a website that lets you check your status! Wheres My Refund? All you need is (1) your social security number (2) your filing status (3) and your refund amount.

Happy waiting...

Tax Tuesday: What Santa and Congress have in common

You better not shout (Yes, it is frustrating to do taxes), you better not cry (Okay, so you might not have a refund this year), you better watch out (hope you saved your receipts...), I'm telling you why.... Congress is coming to town (and collecting taxes)

Yes, there is a strange similarity between the IRS and Santa. (I want to point out the common misconception that the IRS does not actually write the tax law, it just administers Congress's work... probably why taxes are so messed up?) The IRS and Santa invade out homes once a year. The reward, whether it is a tax refund/ lower taxes or presents is directly correlated to your actions all year long - if you are a "good" boy or girl or citizen all year (giving to charity or playing well with others). The punishment, whether it is paying higher taxes or coal has the same correlation.

Both Santa and the IRS try all year to "teach" us to be better. Seems like the two of them are more manipulative than some people's crazy Ex's.  We all know what a "good" boy or girl is like in Santa's eyes, but what about the governments?

1. You should grow up and get married- you get to file jointly!
2. You should buy a home- we will let deduct your interest. Still not good enough? Here, have a tax credit!
3. You should have kids- Its hard enough, so you deserve a deduction for dependents.
4. Your kids should have child care- this way you can work, get more money, and pay more taxes. But we will give you a break on child care.
5. You should go to school- cant afford it? we will help you out
6. You should not smoke or drink or tan- hey, we can implement a sin tax to punish you unhealthy people
7. You should take care of your elders- qualified relative deduction.
8. You should give to charity- charitable contribution
9. You should still take care of your kids if you get divorced- thats right. we will make you pay it AND not charge the poor caregiver income tax on the child support.
10. You should save your money- we just might not tax you on it.

What manipulative people those politicians are. But then again? so is Santa. I guess someone has to teach us right from wrong once we reach adulthood.

They see you when youre sleeping, they know when youre awake (and working so you can pay taxes), They know if you've been bad or good so be good for goodness sake. (Does this not creep anyone else out?)